Recently, the new anime "Blue Period" on Netflix is really good. It tells the story of a high school student who falls in love with drawing and enters Tokyo University of the Arts. I spent a day watching all the currently available episodes.
Upon careful consideration, I feel that I have something in common with the protagonist.
I'm not particularly good at playing the piano or the guitar. I don't speak Japanese or English very well. My programming skills are not great, and my cooking is average. I haven't been able to manage my YouTube channel well either. Although I did well in high school, I don't have any ambitious goals, let alone the fact that I struggled in college and barely graduated. If I had to summarize it in three words, it would be "mediocre at best."
It may seem like I have many things going on from other people's perspective, but it's just because I lack confidence. I know that someone like me, an ordinary person, would need more time and effort to reach the average level in others' eyes. The protagonist was lucky to find their goal in the anime, but I'm still uncertain.
"Treating things you love as hobbies is how adults see it. Isn't it normal to spend a lot of time on things you enjoy?" Anyone can give this kind of advice, but the despair of being so broke that you can't even withdraw money from an ATM can't be solved with a few wise words.
Recently, there's a term called "HENRYs" (High Earners, Not Rich Yet), which refers to the middle-income group with an annual income of over 100,000 yuan. Although I'm still far from being a high earner, I do earn more than the average income and have a relatively comfortable life.
The phenomenon of "poor but extravagant" explains it well:
Upon careful consideration, the increase in salary brings disproportionate increases in income tax and pension contributions. So even though the income on paper has increased, after deducting income tax, pension, student loans, and credit payments, it's not much different from the average income group. I believe that the high income of middle-income households is often earned through high-skilled work, and yet they are the ones who are most exploited by income tax, unlike the truly wealthy who can evade taxes through banks and companies. Those who truly enter the wealthy class often don't rely on labor and skills to generate income but rather manipulate capital, and they should be taxed more.
Consumption tax, rising prices, and shortages of goods ultimately affect the salaried class (middle class), and in essence, we are all pretty much the same.
Going back to the original "Blue Period," I feel that even now, I can't figure out what I truly like, and just thinking about it makes me feel depressed.
Just like in the episode where the character has a mental breakdown, external expectations and pressures can truly affect one's mental and physical well-being. After working in the same industry for a long time, it's inevitable to feel lost about what you want to do.
Perhaps, in the near future, I will also consider venturing into different fields. Maybe I will continue to write code or completely move towards a different industry or field to see if I can gain some insights. "People with goals who can work diligently are invincible," but how long will it take to find that goal? I don't know.